U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize