brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
