Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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