You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Randomize
