Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
