office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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