So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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