you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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