just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Randomize
