Just fell off a train. Bad.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
