I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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