For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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