I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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