So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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