how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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