i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize