Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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