Don't you send me to vm
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize