Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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