mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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