Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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