"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
