maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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