Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
