Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
