is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
