I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
