doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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