I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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