You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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