maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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