Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
