arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize