I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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