Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
