I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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