Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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