question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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