For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize