Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize