Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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