I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
