If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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