I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
