I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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