kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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