Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
