Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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