? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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