Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
