His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
