I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
