you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
